Helloooo, Hellooo, Hellooo

Yes, I am still around! I am sorry that I havent posted here in months. To be honest, I havent been very inspired to write, but seeing as though some of you have been asking, I've decided to attempt my first post of the year!

Ok, where to start? Well, I am now 25 weeks and 3 days pregnant! Time is really flying. My boys are now weighing around the 800gram mark. As some of you know, I had a bit of a bumpy ride (excuse the pun) the last couple of weeks. Firstly, I had to have a cervical stitch done as my cervix was shortening too quickly. If I didnt have the stitch put in, my chances of going into pre-term labour were very good. I was booked off work for a few days and put onto strict bedrest. The second day back to work after the rest I was involved in a car accident. Not my fault! To cut a long story short, I had 3 cars go into the back of me. So back to the gynae who booked me off for another 8 days!

Anyway, I am back at work again. Trying to take things easy, but it is difficult not being able to do everything, when you are so used to doing everything in the past!

What else? Oh, it seems like most of my gaurdian angel's help has fallen through - not her fault. The pram that she was going to give me was involved in an accident. Her sister lent the pram and her car also got rear-ended. The metal frame of the pram is badly damaged and will cost quite a bit to fix. And then, her contact at Pampers nappy factory no longer works for Pampers, so I lose out now on the years supply of nappies :( That was going to be one HUGE saving. But anyway, no use crying over spilt milk!

I havent done my nursery yet, and now with the whole stitch debarcle, I wont be able to clear my study out and turn it into a nursery until the babies arrive, as that will involve heavy lifting etc which I am not allowed to do. That is ok though, as I am moving in with a friend of mine for the first few months of my maternity leave. She and her domestic worker will help me with the boys. So, a nursery really isnt going to happen right now. I know that decorating a nursery is more for the parents and really means nothing to the babies, but I still wanted it to be special. I will get there though.

Well, I think that is all for now. I will hopefully update here more often!

Fruit of the month:

An eggplant


Let your spouse put an ear to your belly -- he might be able to pick up baby's heartbeat (no stethoscope required). Inside the womb, the formation of tiny capillaries is giving baby a healthy pink glow. Baby's also soaking up your antibodies, getting the immune system ready for life outside the womb. Eyes are forming, and baby will soon perfect the blink -- perfect for batting those freshly grown lashes.

Not The Tomb Raider I Thought I Could Be

When embarking on my journey to being a single parent, I thought I was strong enough to do this on my own. And I think I coped pretty well over the past two and a half years. Going to the FS on my own for the first time (and every time after that) Scans done alone. IUI's done alone. Handled BFN's on my own. Had no one with me when I went in for my laps. Going through the IVF journey on my own. No one to share my two lines when I pee'd on a stick. Getting the news that it is twins etc etc Of course, I had my online buddies and support via sms, face book etc. and thank God for them!

But now I wish I was doing this with someone. In fact, to be honest, I always wished I was doing this with someone. I just put on the tough cookie image. I wish I had that special DH who would go with me to my scans. To help ease the fear of carrying two babies. To tell me that I look great even though I know I look like a hefalump right now, and will be 3x times a hefalump in the months to come. To massage my feet when they are throbbing and rub my back when it is aching. To help choose a nursery theme. To be there when I bring these babies into this world.

But that is not to be. So, yet again, I hold my head high, throw my shoulders back, put on a smile, and convince and everyone that I CAN do this, when I am actually not so sure that I can

7 Things You Might Not Know About Me

Leigh gave me this Kreativ Blogger Award:

Here are the rules:

1-Thank the person who nominated you for this award.
2-Copy the logo and place it on your blog.
3-Link to the person who nominated you for this award.
4-Name 7 things about yourself that people may not know.
5-Nominate 7 Kreativ Bloggers.
6-Post links to the 7 blogs you nominate.
7-Leave a comment on each of the blogs letting them know they've been nominated.

Now, I am not going to do rule no. 7. I am going to see who will find this post on their own :)
I have done something similar before, so apologies if you get to re-read some of these things:

1. I am adopted. I was adopted at birth. I do not know much about my biological parents except that my mom was 16 and father was 18.

2. I have to sleep with my bedroom door locked. I was attacked a few years ago in my bedroom (Nothing too serious, other than a cut lip and bruised face)

3. I also have to sleep in a very dark room (my curtains are very thick. I cant stand any light) and the cupboards and drawers have to be closed properly.

4. I am always cold!!!!! Always, always!

5. My favourite meal is a good old fashioned South African braai!! If I could eat braai food 7 days a week, I would be in heaven!

6. I will only eat free range eggs.

7. I am dead scared of being a mom. Even though I desperately want to be a mom and I now have a chance, I am still petrified (Will cover this topic in another post)

Here are my nominees:

1. Eileen

2. Paula

3. Monz

4. Nix1407

5. Mandy

6. Zeu

7. Dee

Happy blogging people!!!!!!

In Transit

I am not too sure where I currently stand (or sit)on OPM at the moment. I sort of feel as though I am in limbo.
I no longer belong in the TTC category, but I dont quite feel as though I have a right to post in the preggy lounge. I did ask 1 question but still, it doesnt feel right yet.

Also, I have been so used to the infertility journey and have learnt so much about the world of infertility, but I know nothing about the pregnancy journey! I am completely clueless!

My first scan is on the 12th October. Hopefully after that scan I will be ready to cross over.
But for now, I wait with my cup of decaf coffee in the transit lounge!

Sharks

Yesterday my car went in for it's 60 000km service. About an hour and a half after arriving back at work, I get a phone call from them. They tell me that they found two problems (yikes, already?!) The first problem was 'apparently' quite dangerous - it was some hose that was attached to the radiator that was leaking. (Sounded bad enough, but what do I know about cars?) The second problem was that my front brake pads were 'apparently' worn and the discs needed to be skimmed. What? Ok, so I dont know much about cars, but I sure as hell do know that they definately dont need to be skimmed!

So I told the guy to replace the hose (R850) and leave the brakes and skimming for now (R1500 excl labour). This morning I took my car to some garage near my work and just told them that they need to check if my fron brake pads needed to be changed. I didnt tell them about the skimming, as I didnt want them to think they could tell me that the discs did need skimming, when it really didnt.

Anyway, about an hour later the mechanic phones me and says: "Hi, I have just driven your car around the block. What exactly is your complaint?" So I tell him that I was told that my brakes needed changing and discs skimmed. He said he couldnt feel anything while driving (neither could I) but he will take a good look.
Another hour later he phones back and says: "Ma'am, there is absolutely nothing wrong with your brakes. In fact, you have at least another 25 000km's use out of them" Can you friggin believe that?

I was so angry! To think that they were trying to con me out of more than R1500 (that I dont even have!) And it makes me wonder if the hose needed to be replaced after all!

So, I went back to fetch my car and pay the mechanic R125 for his time.

Sandton Ford are bastards!!!!!

Photography Week 3

Was much better than week 2!! Thanks for making me feel better ladies!

Just thought I would put up some of the pics that I have already taken. Let me know what you think. Oh, and honest opinions please!

Cue The Music...

****I bruise easily, la la la la....****!!!!

My poor little tummy is purple, and I have only had 4 teeny tiny injections so far! Can you imagine what it is going to look like after all the stimms?

I have always been known to bruise quite easily, but seriously, this is bad! I dont remember bruising this badly with my Menopur shots. Maybe I need some more iron? (I hope not, as I am shoving so many vitamin type pills down my gullet already, that the thought of taking 1 more makes me tired!!)

Anyway, this is a bit on an arb post, and I feel like I am talking to myself... or could I be talking to the voices in my head again?

Photography Week Two

Sucked big time!!!! I feel like a failure! I didnt understand today's session at all, and even though I kept asking questions, I still didnt understand after it was explained again. I couldnt even find some of the settings on my camera that was spoken about.

I feel stupid. Maybe my I.Q is below average?

I dont know. Just didnt enjoy today at all and really dont want to go back next week.
I am supposed to take photo's of sunsets, and roads and crap with todays learnings, but how?????? Fuck it, I really think I am a moron
I am feeling so depressed

When I Grow Up I Wanna Be....

A photographer!!

I went on my first course of photography today, and I am hooked!

I always had an interest in photography, so I dont know why I never pursued it before. Perhaps I was just too lazy? Or maybe it was lack of finances?
Anyway, I was sent by my work to do this course. We take a lot of photo's of our charity that need to go to media etc and we have normally just hired a photographer for specific events, but my boss decided it was costing us too much. So we bought a camera through work and he signed me up for this course.

I am so excited about this. I seriously want to pursue this. Yes, I know I only had 1 lesson, but it has really grabbed me!
I dont know if my boss will send me on the advanced course (I hope he does!!!) I would need to invest in a decent camera (which I cant right now - no money :( )
But I really hope that this is something I can look at doing......someday........hopefully soon......

Look What I Made :)

As most of you know, my work sponsors a home where they look after children that are infected or affected by HIV. There are only 12 children in the home, and they are the sweetest children ever! Their ages range from 3 years - 10 years. Looking after the home falls under my department (which consist of a whole two people.) We throw them birthday parties; we fix up the home and get staff volunteers to assist us with this. We organise fundraisers etc. It's part of our CSI (Corporate Social Initiatives). We also assist with other charities, but this home is our main priority. We want to play a part in these children's lives and make a real difference. We will see them through school as well.

Anyway, most of you also know that I like to knit (laugh later, this is for a good cause!!!!!) So while I have spent the time recovering at home from my lap, I decided to knit each child a scarf. And these are the results:

For the girls:






For the boys:



All packed, labelled and ready to be handed to them:

Erm....

Ok, I havent updated my blog in a while, but seriously, I have nothing to write about! How sad is that?

My stitches are out. I had very bad back pain which I thought was my right kidney, but if I had actually stayed awake in biology class, I would have known that my kidney sits a lot higher than i thought! Anyway, turns out that the Linwood staff thought I was made out of elastic, as they contorted and pulled my body in some odd position, and pulled a joint in my lower back! Nothing that a little Cataflam cant fix though!

I am working from home this week as my boss is away on conference. So that is quite nice.
Going for my follow up appointment with Dr J tomorrow. Hopefully I can start with the BCP's soon.

Um, what else? Enjoyed Army wives and Private Practice last night. My friend bought me Boston Legal Season 4, so I have been watching that during the day.

That's about all. Told you there was nothing to write about!

Life Without Grey's

How does one live without Grey's Anatomy? I mean, it is going to be at least 6 months until we see the next season!!! George dies - bummer! And I just read that it is still unclear if Izzie is going to live or not. Kathterine Heigel still doesnt know if she wants to officially leave the show.

T.R. Knight (George) got tired of his story line going nowhere (to be honest, he had major story lines in all the previous seasons, so how much more??)

Anyway, I have started watching Grey's from the beginning again (sad, I know!)

As The Saying Goes....

If you look like your I.D. photo, you're too ill too travel!!!

And I have just proven that!

Today I went to the traffic department to renew my drivers licence. I was expecting to be there for hours, but the whole thing took less than 20min! Actually the longest part was waiting in line to pay!

Anyhoo, I had to hand in 3 I.D. photo's, which I didnt have. So they sent me to the little blue combi outside to get some piccies taken. Well, let me just say that if Frankenstein still wants a bride, he can have me!!

I look shocking! I look like a dirty druggie who has just been electrocuted whilst having dental work done! And now I am stuck with this photo for the next 5 years! Bloody Marvelous!

I was going to post the picture here, but then decided against it, as I still want you to remain my friends. So, to save our friendships, the picture will not be displayed!

10 of my strangest characteristics

Got this idea from Nix's blog http://nikibs.blogspot.com/

Here goes:

1. Have to brush my teeth before going to bed and first thing when I wake up! No morning kiss until both parties have brushed their teeth! (Talk about killing the moment!!!)

2. I am addicted to Labello lip ice. Dont go anywhere without it

3. When reading a book, I have to finish a chapter before putting the book down.

4. I have to wear matching underwear.

5. I have broken 7 seven bones in my life time

6. I havent had any childhood diseases, except for chicken pox, and I was 18 when I got that.

7. I have to tie my hair up in a ponytail when going to sleep.

8. I am always cold. When everyone else is experiencing a heat wave, I am comfortably warm!

9. I will always end up chewing the back of a pen or pencil!

10. I have to have the radio playing when I drive. Cannot drive in silence!

That's it for now

Who's next?

My Little Confession...

For those of you that dont know, I like to knit to relax!!! Ok, you can stop laughing now!

Anyway, I cant really knit much, but I do knit squares for a lady who collects squares, and then gives all the squares to a couple of women you sew them up into lovely blankets.

The blankets are then distributed to various homes and people who are less fortunate. I like to think that it is my bit for charity.

Anyway, I handed in my squares a few months ago, and last Saterday, we were all invited to come view the complete made up blankets and watch a few blankets being handed out to a home for teenage girls who have been abused.

They were so grateful, it made my so sad. They each recieved a blanket and a scarf. We tend to take so much for granted!

Well, here are two of my blankets that I personally made:

The purple one is mine: